Cold
by Tri17
Summary: Sakura reminisces on how she had gotten to her pitiful state. She was now dying in the cold. Thinking of her dead lover.ItachiXSakura


Another small, angsty oneshot. Yay me!

**Flashback**

_'Thoughts'_

"Talking"

* * *

**Cold**

By Tri17

* * *

Sakura could feel the numbness settling through her body. It felt good to her. What did this again?

'_Oh yeah...I remember now...' _Sakura drifted into her memories, thinking of what caused her to get this way.

**Flashback**

**Sakura walked away, her heart not feeling anything, except the blinding numbness.**

"**Sasuke..." She whispered sorrowfully. Her husband...He had gone so far...away. Sakura stepped out into the bitter night. The snow was falling softly.**

"**How nice," Sakura said, "would it be to leave this place? Not deal with this pain and anguish of this world." Sakura's feet crunched the snow as she walked. Her mind was reeling.**

**Haruno, Sakura...but now it was Uchiha, Sakura. She had grown up. Become strong, but with a cost. Her happiness.**

**Her village...what village? Konoha was no more, at least to her. She had made the village alive and standing, well her and her friends...and lover.**

"**Itachi-kun..." Sakura said, feeling pain stab at her heart. He was her lover, he was her happiness, her everything.**

'**But everything ended,' she thought bitterly. 'All because of Sasuke. And here I am married to him...' Sakura did hate to see Sasuke in such a pitiful state, but then again, she loved it. Her darker, vengeful side wanted him to suffer. But the girl that loved him (who always was plastered on the outside and sometimes got into her mind) said that she loved Sasuke, and would never want him to suffer.**

**Sakura never knew what to agree with. She mostly stayed away from Sasuke, and would never let him touch her. She belonged to Itachi, and he knew that. Hence, the reason they were so distant.**

**She never really knew how she fell in love with Itachi. It was just a simple mission...but she got captured by bandits, saving Hinata. Then got re-captured by Akatsuki (namely Deidara) who killed the bandits, since they needed Sakura to become their medic.**

**She did for the promise that her village would remain safe, and Naruto. It worked out. From there, her and Itachi just got closer, and it happened.**

**She became his lover. Then his wife, but in secret. And she was happy.**

**Her village knew what she had done, and neither praised her (well Naruto and her friends did) nor disapproved of her. It was done for the sake of the village.**

**And that's when everything changed. Orochimaru came back, but with the full force of Mist and Cloud. And Sound, of course. Konoha requested aid from Suna, but it still wasn't enough help. So they turned to Akatsuki.**

**The group finally accepted, and defeated Cloud, while Suna took care of Mist. Konoha had Sound.**

**And that is where Sakura lost all her friends. Itachi, after fighting with Cloud, ended up fighting with Sasuke, and they fought hard.**

**Tsunade and Jiraiya were against Orochimaru, and it was another hard fought battle. **

**Naruto was protecting the village, with the other shinobi.**

**And Sakura and Shinzune were up against Kabuto.**

**Somehow, everything failed. No one knows what really happened. Sakura remembers seeing Tsunade being stabbed, right through the neck. She didn't have time to activate her Rebirth technique. Jiraiya was so upset that he killed Orochimaru with a forbidden jutsu; it cost him his life as well.**

**Naruto had died protecting Hinata and their new born baby, yet it was in vain, as they killed Hinata and the baby.**

**Neji, Tenten, Lee, and Gai were all taken out with an explosion protecting the hospital.**

**Ino had died protecting Shikamaru and Chouji; her last way of telling them she loved them.**

**Shikamaru was killed with a dying Temari in his arms. The two had loved each other to the very end.**

**Kiba had protected his clan's dogs; at the cost of his own life.**

**Anko was killed with her team on a mission: Genma, Ibiki, Kotetsu, and Izumo. **

**So many other shinobi killed with explosions, all trying to protect their village.**

**Even the Akatsuki died...Itachi had given his life up to save Sakura. The rest killed by chakra depletion and exhaustion. **

**To further protect her village, Sakura gave herself to Sasuke, telling him that she would stay with him, so he would not kill the village off. He agreed. **

**There were only a few survivors that Sakura knew of. Kakashi, Konohamaru, Chouji, Shino, Iruka, and Kurenai. Maybe a few others, but none that Sakura cared about. She had been taken away, to this new village; not Sound.**

**And living her days with Sasuke...who she hated and loved, as he reminded her of Itachi.**

**Which is why she had to leave that house. Sakura needed to breathe, to know that Sasuke wasn't Itachi; her love. So, Sakura was outside, recalling her memories, pain, and sorrow.**

**Which had caused her to collapse in the snow and begin to die.**

**End of Flashback**

Sakura smiled bitterly. She had come out here to think, and she was going to die now.

'_A nice relief in a way. I really don't want to be here anymore...' _Sakura felt a relief settle over the numbness in her body. _'I'll be able to die and see you, Itachi-kun. And all my friends! I'm so happy to join you!' _Sakura knew Sasuke wouldn't care if she died. She had refused him many times when he tried to do anything intimate with her.

But she was married...even if her husband was dead.

It was sad...but Sakura really didn't want to do anything with Sasuke; she loved Itachi. Her heart longed for Itachi, it cried out for him.

When he died, Sakura had died too. Mentally, that is. Now she could go physically.

'_Itachi wait for me...Let me be with you...I need to be with you...' _Sakura began to feel blackness setting in. She smiled happily, finally being able to die.

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Sasuke knew Sakura had been outside way too long. _'She could die...I better go check on her...' _Sasuke did like her to some extreme. But never love. He **wouldn't** love. He **couldn't **love. But, it didn't matter anyways.

The person that stayed with him, lived with him (but not his wife. They had never called each other that) loved his worse enemy. His brother.

But, Itachi was dead, so it didn't matter. Sasuke knew Sakura would come around to that, then fall in love with him again. Then they could have children together.

Smirking, Sasuke walked outside, but was met with a sight he didn't like.

Sakura was on the ground, freezing herself.

"Sakura, what are you doing!?" Sasuke ran over to her, and saw her smiling. She was freezing, colder than anything. Sasuke went to run her back inside, to give her warmth, but realized that she was **smiling**. A true happy smile. Sakura never smiled those. Only fake ones.

"You wanted to die, huh?" Her heart beat was no more; Sakura was dead. "I'll take you back to Konoha; you'll be buried next to everyone you loved." Sasuke took her back inside, sort of at peace. He knew Sakura was going to be happy now.

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Sakura found herself surrounded by everyone she loved.

"Sakura-chan! Come look at Hiro!" Naruto called her over to look at their baby boy. He had grown, from the infant to a one year old boy.

Sakura looked around and saw Temari and Shikamaru holding hands, smiling. Ino was next to Kiba, also holding hands.

"I-is Itachi here?" Sakura looked around not seeing the one man she wanted to see.

"Yeah, he's brooding as usual. By the cherry blossom tree, on back." Naruto pointed behind him. "Try there." Sakura nodded her thanks, and went back there, but was stopped.

"Pinky! It's you!" Hidan waved her over, Kisame and the other Akatsuki members beside him.

"Hidan!" Sakura hugged him. Sakura and Hidan had become really good friends. Hidan was funny, and just good to be around to lift your mood.

"Hey, Pinky, don't forget your drinking partner!" Sakura smiled widely at her other close Akatsuki friend, Kisame.

"Fishy-chan! Oh, how I've missed you! Do you know no one can compare to our drinking contests?" The two laughed.

"C'mon Saku-chan, how could you forget about me, yeah?" Saura turned around, and saw her absolute best friend, not including Naruto and Hinata.

"Dei-chan!" Sakura flung herself on him. Deidara smiled broadly, and hugged her tightly.

"Gosh, it's so boring without you, yeah!" he said laughing.

"Well it was boring without you guys as well!" Sakura was so happy. _'I never knew dying was so great!' _

"I see your alive...well...dead..." Leader started awkwardly. "Well, you're here, so that's all that counts!" he finished.

"Leader, you seem...err...nicer." Sakura raised an eyebrow at his attitude.

"Death does these things to you..."

"I see..." Sakura continued her way back, hoping to find Itachi. And she did. He was resting against a cherry blossom tree.

"Sakura, you weren't supposed to die."

"I know but," Sakura softly smiled. "I couldn't stay away from you. It drove me to see you, even in death. I need you, Itachi."

"We're dead. We don't have these feelings. Dead."

"I know...But...We can continue living this fantasy for as long as we want, right?"

"No. Sakura, your time was not yet."

"This means what?"

"That you should go back."

"I don't want to. I want to be with you, Itachi." Sakura stepped closer to him.

"No. You can't. I'll always wait for you, but..." Itachi stood up and walked towards her. "Sakura, you need to live, for just a bit longer."

"No I don't...Why Itachi, why?"

"Because. It's that simple."

"What? I don't get anything!"

"You're not supposed to." Without warning, Itachi shoved Sakura out.

She floated through time, feeling no boundaries. Life was simple. Free.

'_I want to be free.' _

But her brief falling ended quickly. Sakura was thrusted back into her previous harsh life. Back into Sasuke's arms.

"Sakura! You were dead!" Sasuke shouted at her. Sakura looked up a glazed expression on her face.

"I need to feel for one more time. I understand." Sakura stood up, and walked outside to the softly falling flakes. She spun around, everything in her mind hazy.

'_He meant I needed to see more happiness before I die. I needed to live to understand that there are some good things in the world. Even if it's the cold, turning you numb so you can't feel. Or maybe it's the snow, letting you see the beauty of the world.' _Sakura caught a snowflake in her hand. _'Or maybe it's just to believe that there is more than looking forward to death. I do not love Sasuke, I know. We are too far away to be repaired. But, just staying alive and feeling some things a bit more, that's what it means to live.'_

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Sasuke watched the pink haired beauty. He didn't know what happened, or why she was alive. But either way, he was content. Just for this moment. Sakura had forgotten her hard life, forgotten Itachi, forgotten him, and just focused on living. It was nice.

But reality catches up to you, they found out. Too soon.

Sakura was pulled away from her moments of pure happiness, and back into her harsh world. _'I miss being numb...'_

And life went on. The next year, the snow came, and Sakura did the same thing as she did the year before. Froze herself to death.

But this time, she was able to stay dead. No second chances.

And true to Itachi's word, he waited for her. Sakura was dead, her real happiness found again.

But this time, she died with not just the numb feeling settling over her heart, but with the feeling of living. Knowing what it was like to appreciate little things that could just make your hard life so much better.

Even though dead, Sakura continued her life with Itachi. It was like living all over again. Except, everyone was happy. Nothing to make the feeling cloud their hearts. Nothing to make death seem like the best thing in the world. Nothing to make them remember all the bad things that had happened to them.

Sakura walked along, and put her hand on her heart. It had always been cold, she could feel it. But now, she realized, it was no longer cold. But warm.

'_I'm happy. Thank you, Itachi. For giving me another chance at life. I see what I had missed. Just the small things. But they made it better, made my life a bit easier. Watching the flowers grow, seeing the rain fall, or my favorite, watching the snow. It showed me that life does not have to be numb, and that the small things can help you keep your sanity.'_

Walking to her husband, Sakura smiled at him.

"I love you, Itachi." He smiled back, and kissed her.

Her life had never been the best, but her death made up for that.

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I hgave had this done for a couple of weeks now, I've just been lazy about putting it up. I don't know if it's good or not, but it was just a random idea I had. 


End file.
